As of Thanksgiving 2007

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If you look there is probably only one set of footprints in the sand. Be strong, LynetteOf that I am quite sure.....thanks. This has been hell for the other kids to be sure, but they will be ok. I will make sure of that. My 15 year old twins(one of each) are pretty well rounded and together kids. Each is involved in their own chosen activities at school, and they have alot of really great friends. Unlike the losers my oldest was calling friend. My 15 year old girl is such a good judge of character that she already pointed out to her bio-dad a girl that my 16 year old had already started hanging out with this weekend, as a problem and a bad influence. I already knew about her from her dad, but it's nice to know that one of my children can pick them out on their own and say it! I'm not sure that he will really do his parental job and steer her away from that, but at least he knows now. My son just finished his second season of water polo, in which he lettered last year. He sat out much of this season as a "cheer leader" because of a back injury(while he was at his dad's doing something that I had forbid-of course- and his dad never told about it), but he is now in swim team season. Something the boys do automatically to stay in shape for spring water polo. He's a great boy, and the girls really like him. Thanks goodness he is semi-oblivious right now to what that means...or at least has the sense not to get all caught up in it right now. He's heavy into playing video games, in particular Halo 3, right now, so he spends alot of time home, or at his two friends homes playing it. I don't have any big complaints about either one of them. My 11 year old girl is a good girl too. She does have some issues that we are "Nipping in the Butt" right now, due to the example of her older sister. Of the talking back in a "snarky" manner variety, and she is starting to go through puberty too. It's one of the main reasons that I knew my oldest couldn't remain in our home right now the way she is. Her little sister adolizes her and unfortunately, emulates her at times. A piss poor example for her to follow, is not what I need right now. Alissa is a delightful little girl to have around when she is not being influenced by my oldest, and I hope that she will grow to be an equally sensible girl like my 15 year old. She's in the school orchestra playing the violin for the second year in a row. She'll be getting her very own violin for Christmas this year, and she'll be so surprised! She's just getting out of the doll stages of her life, but you can still find her toting one around from time to time. I say let her be a little girl for as long as we can, it will be over all too soon. With my oldest now out of the house, each one of the remaining children can have their own rooms now. They are really excited for that! It's going to be the hardest thing to pack up what remains from my oldests room and put it away. Some things I will be mailing to her, like clothes and her Disco ball, etc. But some will just be put away for now. If she wants them sometime down the road, they will be her for her, or she can tell us to throw them out. Up to her. We are also going to follow through with the counseling, even though the big problem in the house is now gone. I think it's very important for all of us. I have instructed my ex to do the same for our daughter down there. That is neccessary and vital to her. I hope that he will do it and not stick his head in the sand and think that his "fanominal"(spelling) parental skills will be enough. He told me yesterday that he is letting her get her drivers license, and a job....*rolls eyes and feels frustrated again* That's rewarding her for her behavior, not showing her that she has done something wrong!!!!! I told him this, and I also said that these should be earned not given just because he doesn't want to address the issues and have her show her true self to him. I also told him that the counseler here said that he needs to have a meeting before the kids come home so they can tell their sister what they think of how she has behaved and just what they have been going through because of her actions and choices. It would also be a chance for him to truly have a confirmation of what I have been telling him has been going on with her. He could see it for himself and know it's true. I don't know if he will do that either. He is such a dud as a man, he won't do anything that makes sense or makes someone else have bad feelings about him. Especially the children. It's not like they don't already think he's a loser in alot of areas, but he doesn't help his daughter if he doesn't sit her down and make her face her demons with him. She learns only that she can be there and have every little thing that she wants and because of that she can think that I am the bad, or oppressing parent that doesn't really care about her. That is his goal too. Always has been. I can't really think of that now, or it will drive me insane. I have to consentrate on my other children and their needs now. My oldest is her dad's problem now and he will have to deal with what he does with her, or doesn't do........welcome to parenthood, even if you don't want to buddy! We head to the airport in about an hour and a half to pick up the 3 kids. I know they will be glad to be home. I have to wonder what my oldest is feeling though today knowing that she is not coming with them. If she feels anything at all.